Sitting, Waiting, Thinking.

Have you ever laid down to try to go to sleep, but your racing mind just wouldn't let you?
Yeah thats happening to me... right now.
Lets just let you peer into my brain right now! (read as fast as possible...)

"Tomorrow I have to; go work out, find my sparkly black shoes that I need for Miss Florida, go to the office, stop by the Publix, Stop by the church, practice my talent, research for interview. Phew... what else?... Im hungry... WHERE are my earrings for my blue cocktail dress?! Its hot in here. Do I need to get anything else for my Princesses before I leave for Miss FL? Why didn't I use such and such stat in my mock interview... wow... Should I have posted that last tweet? Does anyone really care what that tweet even meant to me?! haha! Im such a dork. I need to write a blog!"

Sometimes I wish I had an on/off switch for my brain.

As you can tell I am in full swing of things! Preparing to leave in just 12 short days to compete for the title of Miss Florida 2013... and then a few weeks after that is Miss America!
This is big time people! Im not just preparing for the Job of Miss Florida... I am potentially preparing for the title of Miss America!

Today I was asked how I was feeling about leaving for Miss Florida. This emotion is incredibly hard to explain, it is an even combination of excitement, nervousness, a calm heart, anxiousness... and did I say excitement?!
Everything is ready to go, but now I play the waiting game.

"Until God opens the next door, Praise him in the hallway."

This whole season of my life has moved so fast that it almost seems like a blur...
I had a conversation with my lovely roommate, Haley, and she shared with me that she really wants me to win Miss FL, but she doesn't want me to forget that this is for Gods Glory... not mine. That conversation, has forever changed my life... I have never been a cocky person, and I have always tried to keep Christ at the center of everything I do. But preparing for a pageant is all about YOU! Its how you walk on stage, its how you market yourself and the organization, it is how you portray yourself to America.
It is easy to get caught up in what you are doing...instead of why.

I want to change the world. I want to change lives of Floridians and people across the country. Thats my heart.

Every day I have been reminded in some way, that this is all for Gods Glory. That is all I want out of this. I want to be a part of something bigger than myself, and I know that this is just the beginning!

I am realizing that this is not about me. Im striving for the greater good. Praying that God would use me to change the world. 

"May the words of my mouth, and the meditation of my heart be pleasing in your sight..." Psalm 19:14